Wednesday, March 24, 2010

Good News!

Hello Friends! I'm excited to finally be able to you I'm pregnant. I guess our little vacation from the worries of life worked. This is why I have been MIA for so long. Let me explain...
I wasn't sure what to say here or if I should say anything at all, but I decided that success stories are important to help provide encouragement, hope, and possible advice. I want to get the word out, because I didn't known before, about progesterone! I had 3 very early miscarriages and changed doctors before I was taken seriously about needing to get progesterone right away. I don't want to bash my old doctor but let's just say I LOVE my new doctor!! I know that the way things happened for us is how they were supposed to happen, but it still upset me that I couldn't get progesterone the moment I asked for it, and that I had to experience 3 miscarriages before they would admit that maybe there was a problem. My first doctor just said, "2 miscarriages is normal so just assume you are normal and everything will be fine the next time." Well, the next time I went in asking for progesterone and they said I had to have a blood test first, wait ALL weekend for the results, and then they would see if I could have some. I know now that had I gotten progesterone that day it still wouldn't have made a difference because I was already too far along and had already started to miscarry, but to me, that seems like a lot of bull crap!
I met my new doctor back in September and he seemed very smart and confident but also focused more on figuring out how to get me pregnant instead of staying pregnant. We didn't feel like getting pregnant was our issue, it was keeping the pregnancy. However, we trusted him and did what we could of what he asked and hoped that when I did get pregnant he would be just as smart and confident about what to do then.
Just after New Years I decided to take a pregnancy test fully expecting a negative because I didn't feel any different and we weren't able to "try" as much as we thought we maybe needed to because of the holidays and such. I looked at the test right away and saw the negative line showing up really fast. I set it aside and continued to get ready for church and even told My Love that I think it's negative but I was just waiting the full time to double check. 3 - 5 minutes later I couldn't believe that I was actually seeing a plus sign on that little stick. I was in shock at first, then my emotions turned to panic. I knew I wanted progesterone right now! I actually had some left over from my previous doctor so I felt safe that I could start it that day. We live with my parents and I knew I couldn't hide it from them, so I took the test into my mom and asked her if she could help me read the results. She seemed confused by my request but was happy for the news. She kept her cool because I think she could tell I was apprehensive, but we were all excited inside. At church I couldn't wait for Relief Society to end so I could talk to my friend who is a nurse for my new doctor. She told me to take the progesterone I had and that she would get me a full prescription tomorrow, no questions asked, no blood tests. She said they aren't that strict in her office. SEE! That's how you handle such fragile women as us! Give us what we need, as long as it's not going to hurt the baby!!
The next four weeks were terrible for me emotionally. I wasn't feeling very "pregnant" and was constantly worried that something was going to go wrong. Every time I went to the bathroom I held my breath hoping I wouldn't see any red. I would curl up into a ball when I would sneeze because I didn't want the force of my sneeze to cause any harm. I pretty much just sat around the house all day every day because I didn't want to do any physical activity that might be too much. I didn't want to talk about the pregnancy or even acknowledge that it was a baby because I didn't want to get attached. I was constantly looking for signs that everything was going well and of course jumped at the opportunity to do a blood HCG test a week after I took the home test. I had done this many times before and knew that I would have to wait a couple days to even know if the second number was going up, which meant we were doing good, but I figured I could worry for a couple days and then have some reassurance or disappointment, or I could worry and worry until something else happens. Happily for us, my HCG numbers more than doubled, which was a great sign. A week after that I was still worried and jumped again at the chance to have an early ultrasound. I went to the hospital and had a transvaginal ultrasound and hoped we could see the baby and hear a heart beat. Unfortunately I wasn't far enough along to see the baby or a heartbeat but we did see a gestational sack and a yolk sack which were both the best news we could get at the time. We were asked to repeat the ultrasound in two weeks. Two weeks felt like an ETERNITY!
At that point I was 8 weeks pregnant, 2 weeks further than I had ever been with any other pregnancy, I had no bleeding, no cramping, and got to go in for my first doctor appointment. I had no idea what to expect but we were so excited to finally have some confirmation that everything would be ok. To our joy my doctor put the ultrasound probe on my belly and we could see a tiny little black spot with an even smaller gray spot inside. Then the best thing that I have ever heard in my life came out of my doctor's mouth "I love what I'm seeing here!" He said that everything looked great and then he showed us the little flicker that was our baby's heart beating. To say My Love and I were so happy is a complete understatement. We were shocked and awed and elated beyond belief. The second best thing I heard that day was my doctor told us that after we see a heartbeat the chance of miscarriage is less than 1%. Ah, I could finally accept and be happy that I was pregnant!
To my parent's and My Love's joy my mood lifted after this appointment and we decided it was ok to let our siblings in on our secret. That was a lot of fun to finally be able to say the words out loud, I'm Pregnant. They were all so happy for us and My Love's sisters even started to cry which was so sweet and meant so much to us.
I have experienced an array of pregnancy symptoms which have been a welcome reassurance that there is still a baby growing inside of me. I never want to complain about anything I've experience because 1- I know many other people have it A LOT worse than I do, and 2- I don't ever want to seem ungrateful for this amazing blessing and miracle that we have. I'm excited for all the phases I'll be going through in the next 5+ months and of course beyond. I can't wait to be a mom and I know that from all these experiences I have had, I will cherish every moment with my child so much more.
At my 12 week appointment my doctor told me to stop taking the progesterone. I was very hesitant and nervous but he said the baby is growing and doesn't need it anymore. So, I stopped, but I had a really rough couple of weeks worrying that maybe I had stopped too soon and I was going to loose this baby.
I am now 16 weeks and the baby is doing great! I really feel like I owe it all to progesterone. For anyone out there, or someone you know, that has had one or more early miscarriages, I would ask that you talk to your doctor about progesterone. Even demand it if you have to! Stay on top of your cycles and take a pregnancy test as early as you think you can, and then go to your doctor and make them give you progesterone. Even if you don't need it, it won't hurt your baby, and at least you'll have that base covered. Also, talk to your doctor ahead of time to find out what their policy is when you get pregnant so you know what you need to do (blood tests or whatever) and how quickly you can get things done. I know that progesterone worked for me and I know of many other people it has worked for too. I hope this information can help someone else out there. We all deserve to be mothers and to have control over our care. I pray that all of you will have the success you are desiring whether it is through natural conception, fertility treatments or adoption. Heavenly Father has a plan for all of us and He knows our hearts and our desires and will fulfill them according to His plan. Thank you all for your love and support to me and each other. We all need to stick together to have joy with those experiencing joy, and to hold up those experiencing frustration or sorrow. You are all wonderful!
If you want this blog to continue please email me or post a comment. I stopped creating new posts because I was having a hard time coming up with topics and I wasn't getting a lot of feedback about what people wanted to talk about. Also, I wasn't sure that anyone was even still reading, other than my close friends. So if you have something you want to talk about or ask your fellow fertility friends here please let me know, otherwise, this may be my last post. Thanks again to everyone!!

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

Taking a Break

I have decided to take a break from this blog. Last night My Love and I were talking about how we have been spending too much time and energy worrying and focusing on the things we don't have control over, including having a baby, among other things. We have decided to start focusing on the things we can control and improve in our lives.

Not a day goes by that I don't think about having my own babies, and I'm sure that won't change, but I think that it's time for me to take a break. I need an emotional break from all the stress and worry. I've heard lots of stories about people who "quit trying" and end up pregnant. Maybe that'll happen for us. But if not, we'll be ok, and we'll reevaluate at the beginning of next year to see where we want to go from there.

I really appreciate everyone who has been reading this blog and for all your love and support. You have all taught me so much and helped me through some really difficult times. I hope I have done at least a little of the same for you. I'm not going to completely shut this blog down, so if you have any questions you want to put out here, or news about your progress, or just want to vent, please feel free to post here. I will still receive messages and do my best to help you all in anyway I can.

Good luck to all of you! I hope and pray for good things to happen for you. If I don't hear from you, Happy Holidays!

Tuesday, October 27, 2009

Tyra's Words of Wisdom

Ok, the show was on at 4 not 3, and there was an actual doctor there giving advice, not Tyra, thank heavens!
Well, there wasn't a ton of information that was spectacular or things I haven't heard before, but I did take some notes.
  • 7.3 million women in the U.S. struggle with infertility
  • 1 out of 7 couples in the U.S. struggle with infertility
  • 2/3rds of couples treated for infertility go on to have healthy babies

Well, this helps those of us who think we're all alone and we're the only ones not having babies. It also gives hope that, with help, we will someday be mommies!

The owner/creator/something of Conceive Magazine was there talking about foods that help boost fertility. She also wrote a book "Cooking to Conceive". You can sign up to win a copy of this book on Tyra's website.

  • Pancakes vs. Prepackaged Muffins -- Pancakes: They were made with buckwheat - which increases ovulation and helps with PCOS - and buttermilk - full fat milk, this kind of fat is good for you. Those muffins are high in transfat which is bad.
  • Turkey Burger vs. BLT -- Turkey Burger: They contain lots of iron and the cheese gives you your dose of full fat dairy. Vegetables and beans are also very good. Bacon is high in saturated fat.
  • Pasta with Salmon and Asparagus vs. Beef -- Pasta: This contains a lot of folic acid.
  • Cheese Cake Brownies vs. Angelfood Cake -- Brownies: Instead of using butter they used Omega 3 canola oil. They used dark chocolate which has lots of antioxidants.

The Scoop on Sperm

  • Sperm is made up of citric acid and sugar
  • Avoid hot tubs, saunas, and anything else that causes excessive heat. Also, don't let your hubbies put laptops on their lap, keep them on a table.
  • Hubbies should use their cell phones less and keep them either turned off or out of their pockets or on their hips. Keeping their phones on standby and in their pockets or clipped to their belt isn't good. Tyra suggests a man purse.
  • Make sure your hubby is getting his daily servings of fruit.

I hope some of this information is helpful. I found the show a bit interesting, but most of it was things I had heard before. I'm excited to explore this new website and I'm going to look into this magazine too! Good luck to everyone out there trying for their little bundle of joy!

The Tyra Show

I need to first preface this by letting you know that I am not a fan of Tyra Banks. I find her quite annoying, especially her show. However, I just saw a commercial that her show this afternoon at 3pm is going to be about couples dealing with infertility. I looked up the description on the Dish guide and it doesn't say that, but the commercial said it, so I'm hoping the commercial is right. I just thought I would pass this information along in case anyone is home and wanted to watch.

Wednesday, October 21, 2009


So this month I decided to try the basal body temperature technique for predicting ovulation, in addition to ovulation tests. From what I remember reading about doing the BBT thing is that you have to before you get up or move at all in the morning, and I think your temperature is supposed to go down, then rise when you ovulate. Then, if you're pregnant it's supposed to stay elevated. I probably have a lot of this wrong, I need to go back and read about it again.
So, I've been doing it all month, and either I have a very strange body temperature pattern, or I'm doing it wrong. My temperature has fluctuated between 96.4 - 98.6 (ish). Some mornings when I roll over to grab the thermometer I naturally stretch my muscles, then I get worried that I just ruined my temp. because I wasn't supposed to move that much! Agh. Haha. Anyways, I guess I'll keep trying. If nothing else, maybe it'll be good information for my doctor someday.

Does anyone understand how to do the BBT technique? Do you have to have a special thermometer? I just have a regular digital one. Maybe that's my problem. Any suggestions or ideas on this technique and how to make it work? Has anyone had success in getting pregnant this way?

Great Website!

I saw this website on a friend's blog yesterday, and another friend gave me the link from Facebook. I don't know how new this is, but I'm excited to have found it. I have only read a few parts of this website, but I think it'll be a great source of information and strength for me, and hopefully for you too. I've added a button on the side if you want to click there!
"We welcome members of all faiths to join in our community and to strive to understand infertility from a religious perspective."

Friday, October 16, 2009

Suck It Up!

Today is a new day. That means a new day to make new decisions. I realize I have been wallowing in self pity for a while now, and today I am choosing to stop! I choose to suck it up, and move on. I need to remember that not everything is about me (shocker huh!). Sometimes it's about other people and their lives and their success and happiness. Heavenly Father created His plan of Happiness for a reason. We need to draw happiness from other people when it's difficult to find it within ourselves. I choose today, to be happy for my friends and family and to share in their joy! And I hope that someday they will do the same for me.
Have a Wonderful Day!